Today, I experienced my first significant episode of mental overload (Burnout). Every stimulus, sound, physical contact, light, was overwhelmingly intense. Even in the simple setting of having breakfast with a friend, I found myself unable to derive any enjoyment from the moment. Instead, I felt emotionally numb, enveloped in negativity, and profoundly disconnected from my own sense of self.
I have dedicated years to studying people, delving into anthropology, and volunteering with both children and adults, gaining insight into how the human mind functions. Yet, I never anticipated reaching the state I have often observed in others. I am the one who remains active, radiates positivity, and offers unwavering support, warmth, and energy to those around me.
I realized I had overlooked the simple question of whether I needed comfort myself. Residing in a foreign country, adapting to a new culture, raising two children, and continually starting over had taken its toll. My mind finally reached its limit and declared, “I cannot take any more at the moment.” Today, I chose to listen. I prepared dinner for my children, kissed them goodnight, and told them:
"Today, I find myself in need of nurturing and support. I shall return once I have regained my energy."
I took a shower, lay down, and granted myself the space to rest, free from guilt, free from pretense.
Across the world, countless mothers, fathers, and individuals bear burdens that exceed what their bodies and minds can sustain. Yet we push forward, relentlessly, endless, driven by the demands of life. If this experience resonates, know it is not yours alone; it is shared by many.
Today, my capacity extends only to rest.
Tomorrow, I will make another attempt, and in this moment, that is sufficient.